I watched this video recently and it got me thinking about some opinions I rarely share.
I think we missed the biggest argument in the marriage equality debate…
Should marriage be a government institution at all?
Nope.
BUT Since we have already given some people rights and connected those rights to the title “marriage” we can’t take marriage out of the government entirely… I’ll explain this later.
Let me break it down for you.
When “marriage equality” is debated I hear those against it often bring up one main argument…
The “_ _ _ _ _” says that marriage is between (a man and a woman, only two adults, etc. whatever their personal religion/belief system says about marriage).
Let us begin with this argument, which can apply to many different religious beliefs, and for the sake of simplicity examine it through Christianity (BIAS ALERT: this is going to be broad-sweeping and will in no way paint a picture of all Christians).
IF we decide that in our version of Christianity the Bible is our doctrine
AND we decide that we will interpret the Bible so that we believe it says marriage is ONLY allowed between one man and one woman (which is a whole different debate),
AND we say that in our religious institution this interpretation of the Bible is word of God
AND we say to be part of our Church you need to uphold the word of God
AND we say that this means you can only be married in our Church
IF you are one man and one woman.
That is fine.
I have ZERO issue with that. You also have a right as a religious institution to say that people can only be married in your Church if they are baptized, confirmed, Catholic, Protestant, Purple, Striped, live in an underground bunker… whatever. It is YOUR Church. YOU make the rules.
However, you only make the rules in your Church. You do not make the rules outside of your Church. Like, for example, in the government.
On to the second half of my debate… If you’re hating me right now for repeating old arguments, stay with me, I promise I am getting to the “new” part.
Let me preface this by saying I am an “Ally” as they say. I support equal rights for all, including those who have differing sexual preferences than the “norm”. I voted “NO” in Minnesota, I wear my rainbow wristband proudly, I try to be respectful, I say “spouse” or “partner” instead of assuming male or female significant other… on and on.
However, none of this really matters.
What matters is that a long time ago our government made a grave mistake. AND THIS IS THE ARGUMENT WE NEVER ARGUE ABOUT…
They decided to take a RELIGIOUS institution, marriage, and adopt it into public policy.
Take here a bit from the first amendment “The civil rights of none shall be abridged on account of religious belief or worship, nor shall any national religion be established, nor shall the full and equal rights of conscience be in any manner, or on any pretext, infringed.”
Basically, we have the right to practice, or not practice, any religion we want to, and the government cannot uphold any one religion over another.
So why did we break our own constitution and make marriage a public policy? There are many theories. I’ll let you research that on your own, as it is quite illuminating. Seriously. Google it.
In any case, we DID adopt “marriage” into public policy, and attached rights to this title. We can’t take away the rights to those who already have them. We CAN however, give rights to those who we have excluded.
NO ONE should be married in the eyes of the state. We should all be allowed to be in “civil unions” or “domestic partnerships” which operate completely outside of any religious affiliation and operate within the state.
So if you want to be married in a Church that only allows people who are left handed to be married… fine. You and your leftie spouse can also apply for a “common law union” under the government so you have the right to be by each others side should the worst happen, claim each other on tax returns, adopt left handed babies, etc. etc. etc.
It doesn’t matter. The Church of Left Handedness does not decide who has rights in the eyes of the state. Neither does Christianity. No Christian, Jew, Hindu, Buddhist, Atheist, etc. should be “married” under law. They should be next of kin.
We should change the title to reflect our bill of rights. We should say that all consenting adults have the right to join with another consenting adult in a civil union, common law union, or domestic partnership, under law and have access to those rights currently given to those with the title of husband and wife.
Should marriage be a government institution at all?
Nope. But choosing your next of kin should be.
Maybe we should call it Family Equality.
-A
thelittlebuchins 